S'more Cupcakes and Green Cookie Dough

At some point in time my mom made these amazing cupcakes that were pretty much S'mores combined with Cupcakes. Don't worry they tasted much better then the sound. So I think I skipped school one day (wait. . . my parents and brother were out . . . yup that's it) and I felt the urge to eat the last cupcake. I was talking on the phone with my friends Sarah and Brittany, okay maybe this was a weekend. I put the cupcake in the microwave for 30 SECONDS, I leave the room to talk and watch 30 seconds of T.V. I return to the kitchen when I heard the microwave beep. The room was hot, extremely smokey, and scary. If I remember correctly Brittany and Sarah were laughing at me as I tried to fan out the kitchen from the smoke. I didn't want my parents to think I smoked. I opened the microwave to eat what was left of it. It wasn't much something like a marshmallow and small bit of edible crumbs. 

Another point in middle school I was talking to Sarah on the phone and once again my parents weren't home, they clearly don't love me. Well I decided I wanted some yummy cookie dough. Now don't go "MATT YOU CAN'T EAT THAT. IT'S UNHEALTHY. . . blahblahblah . . . EGG YOLKS BAD." I most likely wouldn't have listened to you, or will now. I check the freezer and I couldn't find the cookie dough. I knew my mom had bought this big container of cookie dough early the day before for. I was also sure I was the only one who had eaten some. I check the fridge and began to tear it up looking for cookie dough. When I have cravings, I go crazy. Sadly I didn't find it. I tell Sarah the sob story that was going on so far and she suggested (or maybe I imagined that part) for me to just eat some cereal. I go to the Hidden Food From Nick cabinet (yes, we have a cabinet just to hide stuff from Nick) to get some Fruity Pebbles AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW! The cookie dough is sitting on the shelf and I began crying tears of happiness. Cravings remember? So I took the cookie dough with me to go watch T.V. I suddenly smell this horrible smell before I open the cookie dough bucket thingy. I smell myself and made a note that maybe I needed a shower. After I eat the cookie dough I told myself. I open the cookie dough container and almost pass out. The smell was from the cookie dough and worst of all it was green! Yikes right? Once again someone was laughing at me coughsarahcough and I felt the urge to throw up. When my mom got home later I asked her where she had put the cookie dough and she replied, "Oh I put it in the cabinet with the cereal. Nick got into so I put it there." I wanted to send my mom away at the moment and just cry. down.